Re-Thinking Conflict - by Angel Richard

The following is from a blog called livingstorygrace.com and has provided that fresh glass of water for me this week...

Thinking about conflict.
I’ve Googled for the definition, for quotes, and for concepts. I’ve asked people what comes to mind when they hear the term and interestingly enough there are a lot of different answers.
One insight recently came when I noticed the words combined with conflict like “manage,” “avoid,” “quickly resolve.” I bring this up because all writers and readers know that conflict is essential to the plot when you talk about story. Without conflict there’s no plot, no movement, and nothing interesting in the story.
But I don’t typically think that way about the story of my life or the plotline of my leadership. I’ve tended to spend large amounts of energy managing, avoiding, and quickly getting rid of conflict.
So here’s my recent thought, “Would it serve me better to think of “conflict” as essential if not “holy ground”? That’d be a twist.
As a leader my default mode is to think the plot of the “story” for my team or me is accomplishing the task at hand. Though we all have goals to meet I am starting to massage the idea that the conflict I engage whether internally or externally, positive or negative, may be more important in shaping the kingdom of God within me than most of my efforts to shape the kingdom of God outside of me.
I’m not alone in my thoughts as I read this week a quote from Donald Miller about stories that resonate, “Without the conflict the character can’t change. The conflict drives the story because it drives transformation."
There you have it; conflict is the “holy ground” of transformation. The very thing I avoid will actually take me to the very thing I long for. I’ve got an unending ache for those I know and our world at large to experience transformation. Myself included. In order to get there I think my first step is to re-think how God uses conflict in the story to shape our souls.

My response:  Doesn't it sound so much more like grace not to condemn our conflicts, but to "intend them for good"?  Even seeing God's purposes behind ugly words spoken, complicated relationships and internal vexation both exposes my tendency toward "happiness righteousness" (as it exposes my fear, guilt and shame in these states of conflict) and allows me stand confidently in hope, even after foolishly sleeping with Hagar.  But to see Jonah's time in the fish as crucial to helping us to understand Jesus' ministry, to understand Pharaoh's wickedness as ultimately designed for God's glory, to see Joseph's suffering in slavery and prison as the script for the salvation of Israel, to see Jesus' hopelessness on the cross when He was separated from the Father so that we would never, ever, no never have to be for one moment separated from Him...


Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.1 Peter 4:12-13